Not too long ago, raising children looked very different.
We lived in close-knit villages and communities where parenting wasn’t something done alone — it was shared. You had your parents next door, siblings down the street, and neighbors who didn’t just wave politely but showed up, uninvited, to hold your baby or bring you food when you were too tired to cook.
Children roamed freely, and the world (or at least the world we knew) felt small, safe, and stable.😌
But now?
Now we’re raising children in big, busy cities. 🌆
We don’t have grandparents just around the corner or that comforting, ever-present “village.” Most of us are mothering in isolation, trying to meet impossible standards while balancing work, life, laundry, and maybe a bit of ourselves—if we’re lucky. Instead of a neighbour knocking on our door, we’re more likely to have a parenting tip go viral on our feed. 😢
We’re living in an age of awakening, which is beautiful… and overwhelming.
We want to raise emotionally secure, self-aware, confident little humans. We want to protect their hearts while giving them the freedom to grow into themselves. And with that desire comes an avalanche of opinions.
Everyone Suddenly Becomes a Parenting Expert 🥼
I remember when I had Gabriel — my firstborn.
It felt like, overnight, everyone around us turned into a child-rearing expert. Friends, family, even people without kids suddenly knew exactly what we should (or shouldn’t) do.
Some were kind, some were pushy, and some — bless them — had read one book or listened to one podcast and suddenly knew everything there was to know about baby sleep cycles, brain development, and attachment theory. 🙄
And I mean everyone. Even our landlord, who had a baby the same age, used to laugh with us about the unsolicited advice we’d get — we were practically each other’s therapists in those early days.
Looking back now, it’s funny. Our son is older, and we feel more grounded and confident in how we parent. But back then? It was confusing. Exhausting. Sometimes even crushing. You start to second-guess yourself, doubt your instincts, and wonder if you’re already “doing it wrong” before your child can even sit up. 😓
Let’s Talk About All the “Experts” 🧐
And don’t even get me started on the parenting videos that flood your feed — you know the ones.
Some of them are helpful, yes. But many sound like they were created by people who have never held a toddler during a meltdown or tried to rock a screaming baby for the fourth night in a row. You know deep down when advice is coming from real-life experience — and when it’s just packaged content with a nice caption.
Here’s the thing: just because someone has a platform doesn’t mean they should shape your parenting.
Here’s What I Want You to Know, dear mum 🤗
You get to choose what your family looks like.
You get to decide how you raise your child.
You and your partner are the experts of your own home.
Yes, listen to advice — if it truly resonates. Yes, learn. Be open. But filter everything through your own heart, your own values, and your own rhythm as a family.
You’re allowed to say:
🫶 “Thank you, but we’re doing things our way.”
🫶 “We’ve got this — but we appreciate the love.”
🫶 “No, we’re not doing it that way — and that’s okay.”
And if you’re on the other side of this — a friend, relative, or stranger offering advice to a new parent — just pause and ask yourself: Would I have appreciated this if I were sleep-deprived, vulnerable, and figuring out how to keep a tiny human alive?
Chances are, your wisdom will be received much better if it comes with empathy, not judgment. 😇
Trust Yourself — You’re Doing Better Than You Think 😍
Raising a child is hard.
Raising a child without a village is harder.
Doing it in a world full of opinions, pressure, and performative parenting? That’s a different level entirely.
But you are doing it. 💪
You are creating your own kind of village — even if it’s just you, your partner, and your baby some days.
You’re choosing love. You’re showing up. You’re learning. And you’re the only one who truly knows what your child needs most: you.
So trust your voice, dear mum. It matters more than all the noise.